Saturday, December 31, 2016

1013. RV is short for recreational vehicle

The place where I grew up is hardscrabble and beautiful as an old photo of a coal miner.
I was thinking this driving down a divided highway with divided attention.
Then there was the RV pulling a late-model coupe.
When I came to, the car was upside down, rocking back and forth.

Thursday, December 22, 2016

1012. Van Morrison's Domino

You see some strange things, driving a big rig across this big ol' country.
Like this guy, right here, drumming away at his steering wheel.
It looks he's really going at one of those big imaginary drumkits - the full deal.
I think he's working on Van Morrison's "Domino".

Wednesday, December 21, 2016

1011. Strange agriculture

In Washington State, there is an automobile farm.
No one quite gets it how they do it.
There they are, year after year, growing Honda Civics and Volkswagen Cabriolets.
It's the damnedest thing.

Tuesday, December 20, 2016

1010. Describing the flavour of a mango

And so it came to pass that I was eating a mango in December.
The whole world is in that last sentence.
There is so very much economics and politics and farming and science in it.
But the mango was very sweet and tart so I didn't care so much.

Monday, December 19, 2016

1,009. Dewey decimal system

One day, all the books she'd ever loaned out and never got back began to call to her.
Her brain was lit up like a war room map, pinpointing each location.
The very next Thursday she shouldered an empty duffel bag and walked onto the side of the highway.
The books were calling.

Saturday, December 17, 2016

1,008. Buried treasure

"You'd be surprised how much Nazi gold is hidden in the United States."
With that, he unfolded a well-creased map and placed it on the table.
It was one of those novelty truck stop maps that showed you where to find the World's Largest Lint Ball and other such oddities.
It was permanently tattooed with hand-drawn "X"s.

Thursday, December 15, 2016

1,007. Limited time offer

Yeah, guy out back wants to talk to you.
Says he's got a good deal on weapons-grade uranium.
Maybe, he said plutonium.
Anyway, he said he'd be at the Denny's until 10:00 p.m.

Wednesday, December 14, 2016

1,006. The retired barber of A Coruña

There is a retired barber who lives near A Coruña in Spain.
He makes toys for the children and revenge plots for their parents.
He wraps them both - the toys and the plots - in brown paper.
His fat fingers tie up the packages with string.

Monday, December 12, 2016

1,005. Stephen King is pretty normal, actually

I was splitting a pie with Stephen King.
We were chatting about this and that.
It was all rather normal.
Then one of the diner stools swallowed up a waitress, dragging her down to a dark dimension lit only by the eyes of demons.

Saturday, December 10, 2016

1,004. Combustible materials

Pumping gas as I was, the smell of cigarette smoke unsettled me.
The idea of fire and gas and my personal doom sparked in my head.
But I was pumping gas.
So I stood there, pumping gas in the cold, worrying about explosions.

Thursday, December 8, 2016

1,003. RICO

I was laying in bed reading a pamphlet from 1970 on the RICO Act.
My feet were sticking out of the blankets at the bottom of the bed.
There was a cut on my left foot that looked like a red smile.
I wondered, looking at the pamphlet and the cut on my foot, if there was a "bad guy" in me, waiting to get out.

Tuesday, December 6, 2016

1,002. Melba toast years

The doorjamb was the size and consistency of Melba toast.
It was, in fact, Melba toast.
Imagine us, us fat cats, using foodstuffs for non-nutritive ends.
Those were warm, full years of plenty.

Monday, December 5, 2016

1,001. He/she

The letter was persuasive.
He was obviously a gifted writer.
Except he was actually a she.
And, she was actually four smarter-than-average badgers.